I can't believe you called. i can't believe.

and i can't believe you said what you said. All that you said in eight hours of conversation. i can't believe.

i want to believe, but i can't.

and i can't believe myself.

i can't believe you. i can't.

Where was this conversation when i needed it the most?

Where was all this when i wanted to know the most?

i can't.

Maybe. Four years ago if you'd told me, i would've caved.

Maybe. Three years ago if you'd told me, i would be without hesitation.

Maybe. Two years ago if you'd told me, i would have gone back to you.

WHY.

why now? Why after so many years. Why.



i just can't believe.

Weeds

Woah.

*sweeps away dust buddies. and pulls out some weeds.*

So long since i blogged. hee hee.

Tomorrow's my interview!. for now.. i would say about 30% of my nerves are wrecked.

i just heard from TF that there'll be THREE interviewers instead of two. and Plus. Eden and Jeric as observers.

My head may just crack.

today's Quite a good day.

YO-KAY! i'm gonna get back to my research and preperation for tmr's Big interview - Which will last .. 15 mins.

Which means. i'll only be needed in school for........ Fifteen minutes.

what kinda Schooling - Day is that. BUt HECK

HAHAH! FIFTEEN MINUTES - HERE I COME BABY!










oh-kay. back to work.

FINALLY 18!

HwaH.

eighteen. i'm big fat eighteen already.

Actually eighteen's a good age. Because - 17 sounds kiddy. and 19 sounds old. so 18's just right.

(Ch-Loe. if you're reading this. Don't laugh at EIGHTEEN OKAY. i'll laugh at you when you turn eighteen. Anyway, you're still a kid. so ENJOY your privileges as a kid >:P)

Haaaaa. I think once you get older, Birthdays don't seem like a big deal anymore. it just means you're contributing to the ageing population of singapore. ANd. Birthdays are a good excuse to skip Evening classes (like now.) (HEH HEH HEH)

i feel like saying my thankyous.

To:

EeEe and Family - Thank you for being the first to "cut cake" although it was.. impromptu, cos i actually took out the cake so we all could eat without the intention of a birthday song. Haha. But thanks, LOVE YOU!

EeEe - Thank you for loving me! i miss you so much, and i'm sorry if i let you down in the past. i'll try to be a better daughter to do you proud! =)

Papa - i Love you so much, papa. and sometimes when you're not home, i really miss you. =) I FINALLY got my coffee cake. So i shall request for MORE cakes from you. (HEH HEH HEH)

KOR - HAHAH! Thank you for being my brother. we're so alike in so many ways, yet different in many others. i'm sorry for being irritating. i promise i'll irritate you more. =) (HUGS)

Aunty Leng - thank you sooo much for loving papa, and thank you (truly) for your care and concern, and always helping us do the housework. Thank you Thank you Thank you.


Ros - I MISS YOU SO MUCH! (HUGS) You're one of the craziest and smartest people i know. and somehow, i've always believed one day you'll be someone great. (i don't know why). But yes. (Love you!)

Rocky - HAHAH! i knew it was you calling this morning. i'm really sorry, hahhaah. i MiSS YOU SO MUCH! Come back soon okay? If you ever feel like a failure, =) i Believe in you, and Jesus believes in you!

HanChong - =) Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for being my fastest problem solver. Thank you. i truly hope you'll find someone. =) i know you will. You're a great guy! - Lots of love, duck legs.


Okay. have to run. meeting manda soon. will continue later.

You know what.

i think about you, but i don't want to. period.

-____-

Somehow. i feel incomplete. something's wrong.

i've bathed 3 times today.

i'm almost done with my tutorial.

i'm done with my Mix-CD.

i'm done with......................

WHAT HAVE I NOT DONE (LA)

ARG. ACK. BLEK.BLOP.CLIM.CHOK.POOONG!

that -(Long pause) - Is gibberish.


WHAT WHAT WHAT.

i think i need to talk to God.

Jesus, All for Jesus!

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face.
And the things of this earth
Will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace.

Light a candle for the victims of Child Abuse

www.lightamillioncandles.com

And yet, another post in the same day.

This is my blog, and there aren't any photos of me here, so pple won't know how i look like. So heck, i'm just gonna say whatever.

To my friends (and relatives.) who know me, Crap.


MY UTERUS IS KILLING ME

Whats with all the big horrible cramps. and (ACK! YUCK!) the loss of red bodily fluid.

IT HURTS LIKE POOP.

And guys don't complain okay. If you're gonna say getting kicked in your jingglies hurt more, then my question is, do you get kicked down there repeatedly for a few days?

NO RIGHT.

So don't complain.

If you want to, by all means, get yourself a Uterus. (maybe throw in some fallopian tubes too)




HOWEVER


I thank God for how he created me. Thank you Jesus! Just please please, gimme some supernatural painkillers.
Thank you Jesus.

Thank you Jesus.

Another post in a day.

Recently i met a gentleman, Which is a VERY rare case in the little island of Singapore.

The little things one does, can really tell, you know?

and it was a real pleasure.

Cheers - To the gentleman. =)

Re: the post below.

Strangely,

i can't remember (AT ALL) what the unexpected delight was about.

I have no recollection/memory whatsoever at all.

Thats quite sad. Its always good to remember an unexpected delight yes.

unexpected delight

title says it all, yes?

Truly, unexpected.

Truly, a delight.

MY FIRST

so long since i blogged.




ACK.


I'm gonna do my FIRST TUTORIAL FOR THIS SEMESTER -


Principles of Marketing.


(and its only 3 questions.)

then i guess i'll do my Second tutorial

Logistics & Operations Modelling. Which i think is THE best subject for this sem. Cause its easy to score!

Weeee! then after that. i'll read Comics. (Fruits Basket)

CHLOE:

Thank you, My dear! it's VERY nice. HEHE. i'm at book 7 okay, not that slow. will haunt you for the rest come Friday. Miss you all Very much =) Say Hi to your mum for me. and Kiss Jedd's cheek for me. and Hug Zac for me. and Give Mama a backrub for me. and after all these, Pat yourself on the back for me! HEHEH.


Okay!. gonna get started on my tutorial, tutorials.

Dearest Jesus, i thank you for Your holy presence, Holy spirit i welcome You, come and make yourself at home as i do my tutorials. Wanna Pray for everyone studying for A Levels, and all of us tutorial-doers. I ask for Wisdom so we can all study efficiently, i also ask that you give us good memory, to remember whatever that was taught, as well as to remember everything that we learn right now.

above all, i ask Lord, that my every action will bring glory to Your name. i humbly ask for your Mercy and grace. and i thank you because You will never change. Thank you for being my solid rock.

In Jesus' Most beautiful name, Amen.

a day out in the open. or closed.

you know.

i miss God. i miss feeling close to Him. i miss talking to Him.

and somehow. i don't have that fire in me to want to draw close to Him Although, i want VERy much to draw closer to him. WHY


Blephordioo.



(thats just gibberish)

i'm proud to be....

THE OWNER OF..............

JAMES PATTERSON'S LATEST



- C R O S S -

Timetable's out!

Here goes:

Monday - 9am to 4pm
Tuesday - 9am to 11 am (HAHA)
Wednesday - 11am to 1pm (HAHAHA)
Thursday - 9am to 7pm (My goodness.)
Friday - 9am to 12pm (YAY)

SIGH. and a BIGGER SIGH.

should i change my Elective to Calculus? instead of Marketing.

Because if all my other subjects are Qualitative. its really gonna kill.

Moreover, i got A for Management Science which is a Quantitative subject.

And i'm extremely tempted to Switch to Calculus. (Calculus is ALMOST like Amath.)

And i didn't do well at all for my Amaths.

And if i take Calculus, i'll have one less project to do. cos most probly there'll be a project for Mkting.

O well.

i'm gonna see our Course manager with Gek on Monday.. Clear all my doubts first, then see how.


Jesus, Guide me. For your word says, You are the Lamp unto my feet, Light unto my path.

So Lead me, show me Your Way.

its been four years.

Tomorrow's Mummy's 4th death anniversary. and i still thank God for bringing her to Heaven where she's Young and healthy and Happier than ever! =)

i went down to her... tomb?
.ney. urm.. ashes? but they're in a jar, behind a marble slab.

Well anyway. its supposed to be tomorrow, but papa's got work tmr. so we went today.

It was.. hmm.. i don't know.

i just miss mummy so much. everyone needs a mummy, although at times you may think you don't want one. but at some point, you know you Need one. and i miss my mummy.

and then at the place where her ashes were, i was walking around and i saw another "Person".

the marble slabs are about the size of a big bible. so usually there'll be the person's Picture, a bible verse, a cross (all Christians. its at All Saints Home.), and the Birthdate, and date of departure, and a little bit of family tree info.

so this other "Marble slab" i saw, was really simple. No Picture or anything. just a cross, a date - 30th Dec 1995, and a name - Joshua Tay something something, and " we will always love you".

there were many other stuff hanging around. (because this isn't government's territory, hence we have much more freedom and space. so pple like grow flowers there, and hang cards, and make little shelves and put mimature stuff. Really pleasant. Reminds me of Heaven.) lets see some of the pictures of (plastic) Flowers:

There was a Card, which i didn't read until later. then there were some.. um.. display suff. so i was pretty intrigued because there was so little information on the marble slab. so i read the card which was dated 2005. (sorry.)

it was written by all the members of the family, mummy, daddy, and daniel.

and they all said "Happy 10th Birthday!" and it struck me that Joshua probably died not long after he was born or maybe, he was a stillbirth.

and. it just left me so sad. and i know how great the impact is when one loses a family member.

its just sad.

the Daddy wrote (in the card) - about how losing Joshua had brought so much more into his life. That Heaven had never been closer in his past 31 years than when Joshua left the family.
and the mummy wrote - that she missed him so much. she still cries when she thinks about him. but she's happy that he's in Heaven with Jesus. and she can't wait to see him again.
Daniel wrote - that sometimes he wished Joshua was with them. and. how he longed for a brother. and he was speechless. (sad).

well. i know that God has great plans for this family. because God had, and still has Great plans for my family after mummy went home. so i thank God, that He is in control of everything. Even when the whole world seems dark and it feels as if one's walking on a tightrope, God is in Control. He might let you fall, but he'll catch you.


Because, God will never let me (and you) go. i know that for sure.

and thats all i'm living for.

Can You Believe?

i'm so secure
You're Here with me

You Stay the same
Your Love remains
Here in My heart

S o close, i believe
You're holding me now
In Your hands, i belong
You'll never let me go

HAHA

i was so happy i -

smiled to myself.

chuckled to myself.

smiled to myself more.

laughed to myself.

laughed to myself in the bath.

Jumped up and down while in the bath.

laughed and jumped up and down in the bath.



Yes. i was that happy. =)

if you're free =) and bored.

http://shygypsy.com/farm/p.cgi?state=bacbaaaaaaaaabacaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiaaabaabaaaaaaaaaaaaacaaaaaaaokiaaaaibaaeaaaaaaaaaagaaaabaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa&style=sbgrsrzyhvsxnirvnvqytexpbwdabrytzaexywzfypztyvxywvzrtyqhtscszvgkfidblddz&i=2&j=2&cmd=guess&guess=+

please help =) its a collaborative work.

the "..." are the unguessed ones, so type your guess in the little box on the left side. if its correct, it'll appear on the web.

when you're done, click "save game" and copy the URL given, then save it as a comment to me! =)

thank you!

=) thank you Jesus.

i'm not you, i don't have that kinda english.

i'm not you, i can't draw that well.

i'm not you, i don't talk like that.

i'm not you, i don't write like that.

i'm not you, i don't have that kinda figure.

i'm not you, i don't have that kinda friends.

i'm not you, i don't like that kinda stuff.

i'm not you, i don't like sports.

i'm not you, i don't like girly stuff.

i'm not you, i don't have that kinda charisma.

i'm me. i'm Genevieve Jadyn Ong Kai'er. whom God intricately designed for the world.

and i don't have to be anyone else or feel lousy because i'm not as good as other people because God doesn't like me being anyone else.

God Loves me for me. and thats all i have to care about. =)

i Love you Jesus.

walk.

as i ate dinner alone at home.

i thought back on alot of stuff.

about.

my family.

Nat and ros.

Boyfriends.

my mummy.

and i've got so much to blog. but i just worked the whole day with only 2.5 hours of sleep the night before.

so i'm gonna brush my teeth and sleep. night.

Today was good =)

today was good =)

woke up at (HEHEH) 12 plus.

then watched F.R.I.E.N.D.S on DVD.

then, had lunch. thank you mama for cooking for me whenever i'm hungry =) thank you.

Then. worshipped with guitar a little. wrote down some prayer requests.

Then chatted with Terence online. heheh. (Thursday!)

Then. went to work at the tuition centre.

i realise. that the principal, Mdm Lim, isn't as fierce as what i thought she was.. i mean. after working with her for a while, i think i actually like working with her =) Hallelujah!

Then. we discussed some cookie business. gave her a bit of advice. heh. =)

then. i got back to my P5 chinese class cos another teacher got sick and couldn't come.

so. i was the last one to leave and had to lock up the place. (FIRST time.)

thank God (really) that Mdm Lim was there to help me lock up the place. thank God. then we had a little chat on the way down.. (weee! =) )

then. i bought some dinner. then. i boarded a cab. it was strange cos it felt like this taxi was waiting for me at the taxi stand or something? cause from where i was buying food, i could see the taxi stand. and the taxi was there. and somehow, it didn't leave for very long. But yay! no waiting for cab!

then. once i got in, the radio - 97.2 fm was playing 'Qing fei de yi' by harlem yu. so i sang along. AHhahaha. and the taxi driver laughed and made a casual comment.

then. we didn't talk much. (unlike other taxi drivers. i like chatty taxi drivers though. don't misunderstand.) hmm. then halfway, i just started praying for him. He seemed like a nice man. and there were two tiny little idols in the taxi. am not sure whether they belonged to him. but heck, anyway. so i just prayed. spoke in tongue for a little while. the music drowned me out so he probly didn't hear anything.

(it all happened so quickly. so. fuzzy.) then when we hit the highway, and he asked which part of Yishun i was staying at. so i mentioned my block, and he said (in chinese) it was a good place, cos there're always activities planned for the Mid-autumn festival there. and i misunderstood as some chinese Seventh month thingy. so i said i'm a Christian so i'm not into such stuff. then he said "Oh.. (bla bla bla)"

-can't remember the bla bla bla.-

and suddenly, the holy spirit just showed me images of the Little black card - sort of like a name card thing my church has - which contains all the information about my church services and all. so i thought to myself, if i have any with me, i will give one to this man.

so when we were about to reach my place (a turn or two left), (still happily chatting away), i picked out a ten dollar note. and YES! there were a few black cards left! so i happily gave one to him, inviting him to FCBC!

YAY! thank you Jesus for opening doors for me! i really really thank God. i believe if i hadn't prayed that prayer in the taxi, i wouldn't have been sensitive to the Holy Spirit's prompting. then i probably wouldn't have even thought of inviting the man to church! =)

So thank God i prayed! i believe with all my heart, that little black card will come into good use. even if its a month later, or a year later, or a decade later. i believe God will use me! - and that little black card!

Okay!

tomorrow i have to wake up early. cause Mdm Lim wants me to open the doors for the tuition centre. (FIRST time). i know i have to make this right. if not.

1) there'll be a whole bunch of students and teachers waiting outside a locked up tuition centre.

2) i'll probably be fired. =(

3) i'll cry.

so. i need all the powers of heaven to make this right. and Thank God He didn't assign definite amount of power for each person. for His word says that WE - each one of us - has access to the power of all heaven! (how cool is my God.)

Anyway. Dear Jesus, i thank you that i'm a tool that you've used today. and only You can make me feel so happy serving! =)

Dear Daddy God. i pray that tomorrow You'll - shake me, kick me, punch and pinch, scream in my ear - to wake me up. please do ANYTHING to wake me up. Send your angels to bring their alarm clocks to ring like mad to wake me up. i'm not kidding. and i pray for journey mercy. i pray for a good flow of traffic. that i'll not be late.

Father i commit EVERYTHINg into your hands because i know i can do Nothing without You.

You - My Rock. My tower of refuge. My peace. My Joy. My First Love.

The Love of my life. Jesus.

in the most beautiful and mighty name of Jesus. Amen!

Randoms.

Death brings.

Love
Joy
Peace


if only you'll open your eyes.

i miss you

i miss you mummy.

i miss you so much.

Happy Birthday

aa few days ago i went to Tracey's birthday party. and it was quite a regular party. food was good, her mum specially cooked it i think. it was all okay, until it was time to cut the birthday cake.

I could see her mum was having a very hard time trying to gather everyone to get the cake cutting session started. so when everyone was (finally) there, we all sang "Happy Birthday". After the birthday song, her mum wanted to get a picture taken so, in the midst of all the arranging of.. people, Tracey got impatient and just blew the candles and switched on the lights before her mum could get everything sorted out. i was quite shocked. and i could see her mum was genuinely upset, but tried not to show it.

i guess tracey felt like a cake cutting session was unnecessary? or perhaps, she felt she was too old for it.. or maybe. she just wanted to get it over and done with so she could get back to her computer. But in the midst of all these, she failed to realise how much effort her mum had put in to try to show her love for her own daughter. Even though it was a simple gesture, i believe her mum did it out of good intention and love.

Maybe Tracey should put herself in her mum's shoes. and. Not take her mum's love for granted.

cookie love

i wanna give a cookie to everyone i love.

So. more baking required.




Let's Go! Wooo ooo hoooooo!

You tell me.

(listening to "Bizarre Love Triangle" by Frente) (thank you Wenting!)

I feel fine and I feel good
I feel like I never should
Whenever I get this way, I just dont know what to say
Why cant we be ourselves like we were yesterday
Im not sure what this could mean
I dont think youre what you seem
I do admit to myself
That if I hurt someone else
Then we'd never see just what were meant to be
Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for that final moment
You'll say the words that I can't say



i'm confused. pretty much. You just threw me back and forth. Yes and no. Yes or no?. Yes. and no. maybe yes. but i think no. then i think yes. but then, its no. then you made me think yes. then i thought yes. but then it changed to no. and then i thought it became yes again. so i thought yes. and then, i think no. but apparently you think yes. so.

Yes or no.i need my Holy Spirit.


i want to think no. because. because. because. i just think no. but then, i wouldn't want God to not have space to work. so. i'll just see how it goes.

Anyway.HALLELUJAH! no asthma attack today! and thank you Joel for the ride home =)

Combo of the day

i missed my quiet time today morning because. because. because. i woke up late.

was supposed to meet pastor Jas at 10.30 and i woke up at 9.45 (bad bad me.)

anyway. it was an eventful day. first was an Asthma attack. which i didn't dare tell Pst Jas if not she'll make a big fuss and send me home. Then came a big flu which resulted from all the dust.

so it was pretty much a Combo. And it REALLY sucks having an asthma and Flu at the same time. Lets see why:

Its definitely MUCH better to breathe through your nose cause then the air you take in is cleaner. So, of course, during an asthma attack, i would breathe through my nose.
BUT
The flu would ALways result in a blocked and congested nose. so breathing through my nose is not an option anymore.
SO
As i breathe through my mouth, my throat started to itch, causing a cough to develop, which, obviously, worsens the breathing.

And then with the added sore throat which already existed because of all the baking yesterday. Argh.

And. during the Asthma attack i realise i didn't bring my inhaler.
How can i not bring my inhaler.............................................. ARF. Blufph. Blokadoodoo. Arg.

THANK GOD my lungs didn't collapse. Thank God. Thank God. Thank God. Ah. Thank God.
Thank God. Thank God. Dear God please protect me from Bronchitis and Pneumonia. Please. Thank You Jesus. Thank You Jesus.

Cookie lessons.

a few lessons i've learnt from baking cookies.

#1 - Always count the number of containers available at home.

If ignored: All the cookies baked will be left lying around, a-waiting to be eaten.

#2 - Do not constantly open the oven door to check on the cookies.

If ignored: A sore throat will result the next day.

#3 - Be prepared to smell like a big fat cookie.

If ignored: You will still smell like a big fat cookie.

Some pictures of my cookies:

This one has less sugar. specially baked for my diabetic grandmama.

These are from my first batch. a bit sweeeet.

cookie count: 50 plus.

i have too little cookies left. i'll bake some more come saturday. please make orders if you want some. (before 23/9/06)

AHHHHH

someone help me. help me.

Leaders' Appreciation Bollywood Dinner

No, i did not dress Bollywoodish. =)

it is only because of God's Strength, that i'm able to last till now. slept at about 2 last night (saturday) after praying. and then woke up at 5 am to do my quiet time. (not complaining. i enjoyed my time with God.)

i think it really really does make a difference when you wake up early to spend time with God. Although i was really trying to keep myself awake, But somehow as i carried on with my day after i ended my quiet time, i could sense God's presence around me. It was truly enriching. i walked out of the house feeling light and.. prepared - like i could face the biggest problem in the world and yet, not fail, because of Jesus. i thank God for His holy presence.

and then. Work was as usual. only there were lots of persuading cause i was hesitating.. whether to go for the Leaders' Appreciation Bollywood Dinner. Partly because i was 90% expecting karthi to play me out (am sorry to hear about your friend Karthi, Really sorry.) . and also.. cause i didn't wanna be alone. then Aunty LaiGek and AiLee persuaded and nagged and persuaded and nagged until i caved and decided to go.

Thank God, truly. He never lets me down. He NEVER lets me down. =) i love you Jesus.

We ended work kinda early. and i went in for service. and i got chased by an usher to sit amongst a crowd of people i don't know.. Cause i usually sit at the back by myself. I'm not blaming the usher, she was, of course, only doing her job. =) But. i just dislike moving after i get all settled. then halfway thru the sermon, my phone Vibrated. and then *tick tick tick tack tack tack tuck tuck tuck* (smsing.)

Then Joel came to sit beside me. =) (if you're reading this) thank you Joel. =) i appreciated it. BUt STOP biting your nails okay. =| . after the sermon ended, we stood up. and Joel asked, " Did you get enough sleep?" (or something along that line) and THEN. i realise. i was..... beat (means dead tired.) .

And i'm still very tired now.

but yes. um the Bollywood Dinner. was REALLY GREAT!. although i didn't stay for the whole thing. Cause Aunty LaiGek offered to give me a lift at 8.17 pm and i hurriedly agreed, not wanting to squeeze on a bus with the rest of the Tkidzers. (nothing personal.)

But strangest thing was. when we started off with the ice-breakers, which were quite okay =) (i like the table game! Everyone was so excited!! ahahahh. EVEN MYSELF.) yes, um. When we started off with the IBs, EVERYONE was insanely excited. (AHAHHA!!) and there was SO much enthusiasm i think Pst Linda got quite a shock. (sHe was drowning in our enthusiasm.)

There was Jumping off the stage. Dancing on Chairs. banging of tables. Cat-calling. Shouting. Screaming. Sabo-ing. EVERYTHING.

But once we started on the short 6-point sermon prepared by Pst YewLin, the presence of the Holy Spirit was evidently strong. and i'm sure we all felt it. It WAS VERY strong. i could feel it. in my fingers, in my veins, in my head. Everywhere! and the Sweet presence of God just overflowed from the chapel.

it was SUCH an experience to know that even in the midst of all the Crazy fun.. Jesus was there amongst us, watching his children jump off the stage, Cat-calling with their God-given voices, and standing on chairs dancing to the Bollywood songs blasting from the speakers.

Jesus must have laughed more than Anyone of us. i got a hunch he was dancing Bollywood on the chairs too. =)

well. anyhow. i Love Jesus. and i'm gonna sleep now so i can wake early to spend time with Him tmr morning.

All the best to all who are under the pressure of exams. =) draw strength from God, for only thru His strength will you be victorious!

In the lovliest name of Jesus - Amen.

Wo ah ha ha

Well well.

A big THANK YOU AND I LOVE YOU to papa for a great trip to Malaysia even though it was really rushed. and yes. i did miss Johnny Ong Kor Kor. i really wanted to buy him something but he always said my stuff were ugly. hence i decided against it.

Heh. i didn't miss singapore. Because because because. i got to stay in a HOTEL! (Berjaya Times Square)

And the One thing i LOVE about hotels - are the Towels.

Big, Good, Warm, and nice towels.

Super absorbent towels. you don't even need to wipe yourself dry. Just wrap around yourself after you shower. and huff-a-puff! You're Dry!

Yes. Towels. i love them.

okay. Enough.

Don't.

Please Don't.

Don't brag in my face and then laugh about it.

It's hard to come home from a Holiday (yay), to a big bunch of disappointments.

God. i can feel my tears.

its hard.

so please. Stop bragging.

10/09/06

Alooloo was walking down an extremely busy road. and he met his friend BokBok who went to Africa 200 years ago. They chatted along the busy pathway, meanwhile obstructing many people's paths, resulting in lots of "Tsk!" and nudgings. Alooloo and BokBok decided they both preferred Teh Tarik to Coffee and hence, They headed for the Famous SumTek Teh Tarik shop.

Upon the arrival of SumTek Teh Tarik Shop, They were welcomed by a party of lion-dancers with neon bright coloured fluffy pants (legs) and were later told by SumTek, the store owner, that They (Alooloo and BokBok) were the 678 Millionth customer of SumTek Teh Tarik Shop.

They were then given the prize of a Lifelong supply of Teh Tarik powder - each, with a start of 153,208 cartons of Teh Tarik Powder and 248,759.5 complementary Teh-Tarik Flavoured Biscuits, each cut into an oblong shape by Dumpok the Biscuit cutter cum shaper.

(Each Biscuit - cut out by DumPok- was intricately designed in such a way that the Oblong-Shaped Teh-tarik Flavoured Biscuit is able to balance on a needle, ANd has its Centre-of-Gravity marked out with an "X" which is coloured with Magenta Food Colouring, specially produced by Magenta Food Colouring Co. Inc. Pte Ltd. GST. ERP. CBD. OCBC.)

Alooloo and BokBok sat down to savour (hahhah.) their lifelong supply of Teh Tarik Powder. And then.

Decided that SumTek Teh Tarik Shop's Teh Tarik was nice. But not as good as ChupTong's Teh Tarik.

(to be continued.)

i'm seriously bored. and sleepy.

Forgive and forget. thats what God would do.

So.

i'm not saying these because i think i'm righteous or people have wronged me whatsoever. i just feel its necessary to do some... Housekeeping. Because i know God's about to do a great work in my life. So. lets just clear out some old stuff to let the new in.

To you, who said you would NEVER lie to me, but cheated for the longest time. i forgive you.

To you, who vented your frustration and loneliness on me when mummy passed away. i forgive you, and still love you.

To you, who -in your frustration - said i would never grow up and always be childish. i forgive you. (and reject that comment in the name of Jesus. hehe. nothing personal.)

To you, who brought me back and forth for 3 years. i forgive you, and am glad we're still friends.

To you, who said i was dumb. i forgive you.

- - - - -

To you, whom i've let down after 2 months because of my selfishness. i'm sorry.

To you, whom i've disappointed when mummy passed away. i'm sorry.

To you, whom i've vented my anger on. i'm truly truly sorry.

To you, whom i've irritated. (hehehe). i'm still sorry.

To you, whom i've abandoned because i was irresponsible. i'm sorry. and i still love you so much.

To you, whom i've lied to because i was selfish and jealous. i'm sorry.

(the above-mentioned are of reference to specific people)

There's still alot more, i know. But to anyone whom i've wronged or anything, i ask for forgiveness.

- - - - -

Lord, thank you for revealing to me my own true ugly nature.

But your word says that No matter how ugly i am, You will never reject me. You will NEVER abandon me. and even when the whole world has turn its back on me. You pick me up. You hold my hand. You wipe my tears away.

and i know there's so much more you can reveal, but choose not to. Cause i know if you reveal all in one go, i'll probably just... decompose. i think.

Lord. i thank you, for you are graceful. i thank you that you are gonna help me to change my ugly nature, to be more and more like Christ. and i am truly grateful that you WANT to help me change. Thank you Jesus.

- - - - -

And

To All you, who smiled and said Hello. Thank you. Thank you. =)

(especially you.)

Eeeew.

Yesterday during Cell group. i stepped on a worm. or a millipede. the ones which curl into little spirals. yuck.

and after i accidently murdered it, i decided its name is. Wilbert.

i know what you're thinking. and No, i don't have any friends by the name of Wilbert. its just a random thought.

anyway. i HATE worms. Abhore. Detest. Loathe. whatever. i just Don't like them. they give me the creeps. and i quiver. shiver. shake. jitter. shudder - when i see them. warning. i may throw up upon seeing a worm.

YUCK

Yep. enough of worms.

i had a dream. i was standing........................................


Yep. enough of dreams.

i'm SO HAPPY tomorrow's sunday! its my FAVOURITE DAYEEE!!

Heheh. BECAUSE I'M GOING TO CHURCH! Yay! church. church. church.

To be in the presence of the Almighty - truly is The greatest Privilege. The highest Honour. and i just Love standing in the presence of God. to feel his Arms embrace you. and to hear his sweet voice. to smell his presence. ah..


Church!
the smell of the Expo aircon. and all the TouchKidz stuff. O, so familiar. No, its nothing weird. i just remember stuff by their smell.
Like People. Everyone has a different smell. its not an odour. neither is it fragrant. its just.. a scent. =)


Thank you Jesus for making my nose! Thank you Jesus for giving me the ability to smell. Lord i pray for Journey mercy tomorrow. and i pray that You'll wake me up at 5.30!!! i really need Your morning call Lord. and i thank you Lord that tomorrow will be THE BEST day! YAY! i can't wait to go to Your house! The house of God! WOOHOO!

you wanna come? =)

hmmm.

Should THIS be the drive to want to draw closer to God? i seriously don't think so.

i don't think i wanna draw close to God just because people around me are so close to Him that i feel compelled to be close to Him.

NOOoo. That should NEVER be the case.


Jesus. Help me to want to draw nearer to You. Help me to want to Love You more and more and more each and every minute. Lord i pray you ignite in me this Fire to burn for you, to yearn for you. i want to long for You like i've never done before. i want to love you more than anything or anyone else.

And Jesus. please give me direction.. i'm pretty lost. love you! kisses.

Ah.

Sorrow - is a sign of repentance. Not Guilt.

failed.

Jesus i need Your grace. Help me.

i REALLY cannot do this on my own! i fail every single time i rely on my own strength. and i know it is impossible. Lord. Teach me to draw strength from You and You alone. i need to stop this bad habit. and i kn0w its wrong. Although nobody's perfect but you've made me in the image of Christ. Help me! i want to draw near to You.

i Don't wanna lie in bed every night before i go to sleep, thinking about how i've sinned and done wrong even when i KNOW its wrong. i don't. i really don't.

Lord Jesus, i need Your forgiveness. i need to Change. i need Your strength. i need to direct my heart towards Yours. i need Your Grace.

i want Your holy presence in my life.

and it's all that matters.

"I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance." -Luke 5:32

Condolences

To Steve Irwin.


God bless his family and keep them safe.

And announcing today's Most heard Line.

Coming in third place is....................... "EH! why you all so stiff! Smile smile!"

And in First runner-up........................ "Okay Look at the camera. Look at the camera."




And THe FIRST PRIZE GOES TO......................................................................................................................................................................... "MORE TEETH PEOPLE! MORE TEETH!"



And yes. the photoshoot.

it was okay. but EXTERMELY TIRing.
for those of you who think photoshoot is just about standing there and smiling. you're so damn wrong.

maybe its the Heels. maybe its the formal wear. maybe it the fact you have to think of poses. Maybe its because you have to try NOT to blink even when the flashes from the uber bright lights in front can blind you inside out. Maybe its because you have to stand in the same position for at least half an hour. Maybe it's because you have to change the way you look without moving.

whatever. its just plain tiring.

but it's kinda fun. haha. weird. but definitely an experience to remember.

Now i can't wait for the TP posters to be out. truly wanna see what it looks like.


Bleah. my voice is only about 70% back. and its so weird. talking without sound. although i LOVE IT!! Yes i do. Love it when my voice breaks.

the only thing i don't like is. that i can't sing. i can't sing christmas carols. i can't sing praises. i can't sing songs for God. i can't sing.


okay. i'm gonna read "God came near" by Max Lucado. its one of the best christian books i've ever read. Beautiful yet simple english. mm mmm. just lovely. lovely. lovely. i'll quote some paragraphs when i'm free. which i am - now. but ahya.

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

byee!

-untitled-

With reference to Rocky's comment, thank you so much Rocky. and Truly! i believe we will catch a movie marathon together someday! =) YAY!

okay, on to my day's "recollections".

My God.

i can't believe what i just did. Wherever did that courage come from!?

Where? Where? did it just poof out of nowhere? Did it just zoom out of my surroundings?

WHat?! WHERE!

Did i make a wrong move? did i? i'm frantic. i'm panicking. i have absolutely no idea what came over me.

It may not have been a big deal (or even a tiny tiny deal) to most (well. 99% of you) of you out there. BUT it means ALOT to me. Because.

Because. Because. Because.

Simply Because. Gen doesn't make the first move. Well. Whether or not That even counts as a "move". it still is a big breakthrough.

BUt. i think. i think i think i think.

it's not God's plan.. so i SHALL NOT. WILL NOT. go any further.

Jesus Give me Strength. Give me Wisdom. Let me hear from You. Whether this is right or not. i NEED TO KNOW. i don't wanna grope around in the dark. i want Your Light. i want Your life. if its not Your Will, its Wrong. wrong wrong wrong.

So Father, let me know. talk to me. Let me hear Your sweet still voice.

I Know you Love me, Jesus. And you and i both know i can never love you like you love me.

But Jesus, i love you. i really do. i love you. with whatever little bit of love i can give.

i wanna love you like my first love, but sometimes i don't remember you.

i wanna love you like my best friend, but sometimes i don't feel like talking to you.

i wanna love you like you're my father, but sometimes i just choose to disobey you.

but Jesus, i love you. with whatever i can give. i love you.

Moo-vie Maa-rathon

YAY!

three movies. free flow of popcorn and drinks.

Hahah. i don't know where to start. Okay. the three movies were. Monster house, devil wears prada, and John Tucker must die. (thats a sneak. well i'm one of the first people to watch it! Singapore will show in end of september.)

Lets Go!

Monster House - was good. =) liked it quite alot. i liked the story line, where Mr nebbercracker was actually a good guy. and all thats happened with Constance - the Giantess. Visual Effects were good. No lame jokes. (very good) and pretty exciting. sO yes. i think. 8/10 (i LOVE Chowder.)

The devil wears Prada - was okay. i like Nate (is that how its spelt) and Meryl Streep!! She is GoOOd. and for some strange reason. i like Emily, the first assistant. hahha. but anyway. storyline was o-kay only. some parts were so cliche. the part where shw walked away from Miranda (decided to quit) and then. coincidently walked to a pond and coincidently have Miranda call her - so she could throw her phone into the pond. hahah. but overall, was ok. 7.5/10

John Tucker must die - (comedy) was okay. storyline was... somewhat predictable. but some parts were funny. Haha. yes they were. and my gosh. John tucker was played by the gardener from Desperate housewives. HE's HOT! hahaha. and yes. *clap clap clap* so good looking. well. you'll get to watch end end september! =) i'll give it a 7/10.


Free flow of popcorn - surprisingly. Manda and i didn't eat much of it. We were the only loonies who didn't even finish the first round. thanks to the big burger and Oreo Milkshake (so thick) we had at Maestro Bistro. And SADLY AND ULTRA UBER DISAPPOINTINGLY, they only had SWEET popcorn. what about us - SALTY POPCORNS lovers. =( Hence. i didn't eat much.

Overall. it was a good night! =) an experience to remember. Hahaha. truly. and it marks the end of exams and start of holidays for me. i lost my voice because i didn't sleep enough. (its just my body. always like that.) so i reached home at 7. thought everyone was asleep so i crept around the house quietly. making as little noise as possible.

Then after my bath. i realise that my Dad and Granma were not at home. so the only pig sleeping was my brother. whom i think. will never wake up to any noise whatsoever. so i stopped creeping around the house, and realise it didn't make much of a difference - whether i crept around or not. its still as noisy. ahhaha.

So. thank You Jesus for this blessing you've given me. Thank you thank you. i really love it when you plan small little things like that to make my life more... um... happening? hahhah. thank you Jesus for keeping us save all the while. thank you Jesus for watching the movies with us! And i believe that You'll be teaching me somethings from the Movies. =). Oh yes. i'm going shopping with Manda later. Please Please Please. help me to shop. help me to find the right stuff at the right price to buy. and i thank youLord for your guidance in everything. HUGS AND KISSES!

In Jesus' most wonderful name - Amen.

Yes Sir.

when God says "No." its shall be "no."

Won't you Lift your hands to praise the LOrd!

HALLELUJAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Scm is FINALLY over. and the Lord is so amazing. He brought me to all the chapters that were gonna be tested. and helped me to remember the details. I LOVE YOU JESUS!

Today i was on the bus. after (extremely) reading thru my super duper ultra uber compressed SCM notes, i decided to take out my book to read. and OH. Dear holy spirit just touched my soul with only the introduction of the book, and i could feel tears just well up in my eyes!! if He can do SO much with just the introduction. can you imagine wat he'll do for the rest of the book?! i'm so excited!!! and i'm expecting the Lord to do GREAT GREAT works in my spirit!

I know. No matter how high your expectations are, God can reach them. and HE will do EXCEEDINGLY MORE.

I can't wait!!

(sings to the children song 'Jesus is my superhero') Jesus you're my superhero! You're my star! and you're my best friend!

i LOVE JESUS! i LOVE JESUS! i LOVE JESUS!

O NOOOOOOOO.

O no no no no.

i'm smiling to myself.

i can't help it.

Someone pull me back to reality!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAHAHAH. i'm so happy even though i'm not done studying. WHICH IS WRONG. i'm so distracted.

JESUS HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

JEEEEEE-SUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and its raining cats and dogs outside.
raining hamsters and rabbits.
raining elephants and giraffes.
raining zebras and antelopes.
raining iguanas and Godzillas.

(sing to the tune of "Where O Where can my baby be") O Where O Where can my Papa Be..................

O. Papa's in Malaysia.

there goes the only nagger left. no more "Sleep early ah!", "tomorrow no paper ah? don't play too much computer ah!"

O NO O NO.

Let us all witness the horrific Procrastinator takeover ME. ME. ME.

wherever did that mugging spirit GO??

i'm so dead. Let's hear the procrastinator talk.

PRocrastinator: Whats the rush all about. The paper only starts at 7 in the EVENING tomorrow. You still have at least SIX hours to study tomorrow. No big deal LA.

And i'm so worried because i'm not even worried about tomorrow's paper! its already 1 am. and i'm not even half done.




Dear Lord Jesus. Your will be done lord. your will be done. i neeed help. i need help. Help me. help me. Just gimme a kick whatsoever. or punch me in the head. reveal to me the dire consequences i have to face if i fail the paper.

DO SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


yes. i'm gonna do something.


Procrastinate.

In. Out. and Gone.

Sometimes. Disappointments are hard to deal with.

The higher the expectation. the harder you fall. and i don't - believe in that.

Or. maybe i do.

but i know - no matter how hard i fall. He's always there for me.

Sometimes he lets me fall. so i will learn. and when i do (fall). He picks me up, gives me a hug, and tells me its alright and he still loves me. He gets me back on my road, and helps me kickstart.

Sometimes, he breaks my fall. and catches me, when no one else can.

He is the love of my life. My everything. My all in all. My sweetest, dearest, bestest, best friend. My first Love - and the only love.

He is. My Jesus.

And then, there were two.

Two.
Wow.


i met you in the morning. you saw me! and then, you were stationed to work at our table. and we got to talking. talk talk talk. yak yak yak. and yes, the flow of information was goo-OOd. It was the most we talked since we got acquainted with each other.


-some information used to exist here-


In hall 10 today, Pst Khong said he wasn't gonna preach because he sensed the Holy spirit telling him that our church isn't receiving the message. so he gave a few categories of people whom God was calling out to.

and i was really touched today. i felt the sweet presence of God. it was soo sweet. it was perfect. i could just sit there all my life. and during worship i truly felt the Lord's embrace. thank you Jesus, for never letting me go. Thank you Jesus, for You NEver abandon me. thank you.

and i experienced for myself what Vivian Hibbert said! She mentioned, during the prophetic worship seminar, that when the presence of God really comes, You wouldn't even feel like saying anything, or do anything, not even move an inch. and i felt THAt for myself today!

In His sweet presence. when you immerse yourself in His sweet presence. it was Strong, yet gentle. -sweet and fragrant. the best. none can compare.

In His sweet presence, it even felt weird to speak in tongues. it felt strange to want to express myself.
Even as i walked out of the hall to head home, as i walked, i could still feel His presence. it even felt wrong to reply to an sms. (sorry Jeremy).

And thats. the Sweet presence of God. ahh....

I WON!

i just won FREE PASSES TO A MOVIE MARATHON!!!

WEEHEE! and its on 1st september friday!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOO HOOOO!!!

Where: Orchard Cathay Cineleisure
What: Monster House, The devil wears prada, and a SURPRISE MOVIE SNEAK PREVIEW!
ANd: free flow of POPCORN AND DRINKS!

WOO HOO~!

Thank God man. REally. Thank you Jesus. Thank you thank you thank you. HALLELUJAH!
HALLELU
HALLELU
HALLELU
jah!!!!!!!!!!!!!



dANG DEE DANG dee dang dee dum

Dum dee dum dee dum dee dang!

and yes. i invited manda to join me. Because i didn't wanna invite JC pple. they'll be studying. and Well. 1st september is when i end my exams!!! which is why i should celebrate with a polyian!


WEE.

YAAHOOO!!!!

THANK YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-O-O-O-O-O JEEEEESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Love of the Lord.

Soak yourselves in the Love of Jesus.

If you would take just ONe step towards Jesus, He WILL Run a million steps to you. are you willing to take that tiny step? because, Jesus is waiting for you...


Fall in love with Jesus. -Holy spirit and Me

i keep falling in love with Him,
over and over again
His love for me is greater than anyone can give,
i keep falling in love with Him.

It gets sweeter and sweeter
as the days go by
O, what a love between my Lord and i
I will arise and sing of His love for you and me
i keep falling in love with Him.

His love is fresh like the dewdrops in the morning
His faithfulness is for eternity
His joy is warm - like the warmest streak of sunshine in the sky
O! i'm so in love with Him!

'Though there'll be trials and battles to fight,
i know my Lord will walk with me for life.
He'll hold my hand, and wipe my tears,
He'll take away my fears.
I want to love Him with all of my life.

Freedom!

The truth is scary.

The truth is big.

The truth changes everything.

The truth is what most people DON'T know.


The bible says (and what all Christians know) - The truth shall set you free


Freedom - What everyone longs for.
but yet, most don't get.

In Christ alone, there is freedom.

(which brings me to this song which i shall end this post with..)

In Christ alone,
I place my trust.
And find my glory in the power of the Cross

da dadada daa of me (* the Da(s) are forgotten lyrics)
Let it be said of me.
My source of strength,
my source of hope,
is Christ alone!

Well. lets talk a bit more.

Thank you Jesus for dying on the cross for my sin. although i may not know the full impact or even see or grasp the truth yet, Lord Jesus i pray you'll continue to reveal to me, bit-by-bit at Your own pace, what it truly means to carry the cross every day of my life.

Lord i thank you for Your mercies. For they are new every morning, and Your word says Your grace is sufficient. Thank you Jesus. Thank you Because -

You have already Died for me. its not "going to die" or "will die in the future" but you already did it! And i thank you Lord, because because because, it should've been me on that cross. It should've been me at the crucifixtion, it should've been me suffering, it should've been me who was shamed and rejected. But you, the pure and holy one, the one who knew no sin Became sin and died for me. For me.

Thank you Jesus.

Visions i've received, Voices i've heard. Were they from You Lord? Lord Hold me, Guide me, Lead me and walk beside me. For i need You. And you are all i need.

Visions of me leading worship for the adults. were they from You? If they are, Lord, i am willing. Because only You know what's ahead of me. and only You make the best plans.

Amen.

-

Down at Your feet O Lord,

Is the most high place.

Ta ta dum dum dum (i forgot the lyrics)

i seek Your face.

i seek Your face.

[chorus]
There is no higher calling,

And no greater honour

than to bow and kneel before Your throne.

I'm amazed at Your glory

Embraced by Your mercy

O Lord, i live to worship You.

It's hard to be nice.

and its hard to love.

Well. its easy to love those who are easy to love.

how about those who've hurt you before?

Those who are just plain irritating?

Those who've betrayed you?

Those who lie right in your face?


And yet. that's God's greatest command. love your neighbour as yourself.

Simple as it is, its the toughest thing to do, yes?

Faithful is my God

Psalm 73:21-26

"then i realised that my heart was bitter,
and i was all torn up inside.

i was so foolish and ignorant -
i must have seemed like a senseless animal to you.

Yet i still belong to you;
You hold my right hand.

You guide me with your counsel
leading me to a glorious destiny.

Whom have i in heaven but you?
I desire you more than anything on earth.

My health may fail, and my spirit grow weak,
but God remains the strength of my heart;
He is mine forever."


Rain down on me
Rain down on me
Here in Your presence i am free
Pour down like rain
Come touch me again
Lord let your presence fall on me

God is so GREAT!!

thanks to my dearest brother, i got to see the conversion of Brian Head Welch - Guitarist of Anti-Christ heavy metal band, KoRn. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5H2IDo0fIA)

Praise God. Through his testimonial, God has once again, revealed to me how great His love is. He's not gonna point at sinners and laugh, "You are going to HELL!!!!!" no no no. You've got the wrong God.

God is gracious.

God is merciful.

God is good.

and he knows that all of us fall short of his standards. Thats why he sent Jesus! For those of you out there thinking- " i' m too bad, God won't want me." or anything along that line,

Well, i tell you, God came down to earth for people like you. No matter how bad you are - have you murdered? committed adultery? Lusted? Lied? Bore anger? God's Love knows no bounds. truly. The bible says, God's grace is sufficient. but i think, IT'S MORE THAN ENOUGH!

God gives in abundance. He's a good God. Don't allow self-condemnation to creep into your life, because God is saying to you today, "Whatever you've done wrong before - i'm not gonna look back and blame you. Are there people mocking you? teasing you? or laughing at you? I, the maker of the earth, will not laugh at you, I want to help you."

Will you open the door of your heart to allow Jesus to enter?


"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me. "

-Revelations 3:20

Crap.

Always.
Always.
Always.


i can never get past this.

i need strength from God. Jesus i need help, i can't do this alone so please don't forsake me.

My Island Home

Happy 41st birthday Singapore!


anyway. i was watching the National Day Parade. and i thought to myself - Why would anyone complain what Singapore has to offer.

Why. I commend (from the bottom of my heart, truly) all the performers and civil servants who paraded tonight. i think Singaporeans should thank them for putting on a great performance, So. i thank thee - Paraders.

Listen.

i listened to the national day songs. and, like every other time, some songs just put tears in my eyes.

Especially "Count on me, Singapore"
Count on me Singapore, Count on me Singapore. Count on me to give my best and more Count on me Singapore. We can achieve Singapore, Do my best and more. Together Singapore, Singapore.

And i think to myself. can Singapore count on me? Can Singapore count on anyone of us?

Can Singapore count on YOU?

See the beautifuly Magnificent display of fireworks. Everyone - Elderly, Teenagers, School kids, Bosses and employees, businessmen and women, teachers and students, husbands and wives, granmas and granpas. daddies and mummies. - All go WoW! faces like that -> ( O . O)

then. the day after. start complaining about taxes, bills, fines, traffic rules and regulations, how the Lee family's taking over the government, stupid policies put in place, how the government only wants to "eat" our money.

Singaporeans - Singaporeans.


Dear heavenly father, i thank you for your grace and mercy. And it is only by your grace and love that Singapore can make it this far. Lord, i know you Love little things. Thank you for loving Singapore. Little as she is, however limited her resources are, You saw us through all the obstacles. Thank you Jesus. Thank you Jesus for 41 years of Grace and protection.

Lord, although today, as Singapore celebrates her birthday, and as i end my 40-day fast. i wanna pray for East Timor.


Lord, i thank you that your heart is with and for East Timor. Just as you brought us out of our struggles into success, Lord i believe that You are gonna do the same for East Timor - only even better. i believe that.

Lord. you hear the cries of your children suffering, you hear the painful moans of parents who lost their children to famines and disease, you hear the desperation of those who are at the brink of death.






i know you hear them. and ONLY YOU know what they want, what they need. i pray this day that you'll send relief to them. You'll touch them in your own creative ways.

i break every spirit of depression, every spirit of darkness. i cast you out in the Mighty name of Jesus. You are not welcomed in East Timor. i curse you to death - with all the power of heaven, i bind you powerless.

jesus Jesus. Help them.


In the victorious name of Jesus - Amen.

Are we, Singaporeans, thankful - yet?

Always Always.

Give thanks! (with a grateful heart!!)


i thank God for YAnni. i thank God for the great great superbly beautiful music composed by Yanni.

i thank You, God, for always being here by my side, constantly waiting for me to step out of my world, to talk to You. and i'm sorry for always failing to recognise Your presence.

Lord i just ask. that you'll teach me repentance. show me what it is to repent. because i really want to know. Show me - the areas of my life where you're not satisfied with.


And LOrd. from today onwards, i'll try my best to pray unselfish prayers.

Holy spirit, touch my soul with the passion of God. help me to see people through Jesus' eyes. Help me to Love as He loves. and Give - as He gives. Lord teach me, there's so many many more things i have to learn. Because You created me in the likeness of Christ and i know that i'm no where near that.

Lord i wanna pray for your children in East Timor. Lord you hear their cries, You see the tears in their eyes and i know you weep for them. Lord. i just pray that today, you will touch my soul and my spirit to have the compassion for them. i want to help them Lord. i want to show them your love. and i want to tell them about how Jesus came to die for them.


In the Mighty name of Jesus, i curse every spirit of darkness over East Timor to death. You Shall not reign over East timor because Jesus has won the victory and i command- with all the authority of heaven- that You leave East Timor right now. i break the strongholds over East Timor in the name of Jesus.



Amen

LOM Centre 1

HAaaA!

Thank You Jesus for helping me to go thru the Leadership and Character presentation!


AMEN!!

FOUR LONG DAYS

i've not schooled for four long days.


Dear lord Jesus. my brain is a complete blank. other than... um. I'm sorry. and i'm a sinner. and please forgive me.


So dear Lord. speak to me. talk to me. let me hear your voice. Your sweet still voice that my heart recognises. i miss your holy presence.

Help me to deal with the mixed feelings i'm experiencing now. Help me.

There are so many many things to do. projects. presentations. revision. tutorials. coming exams. moving of house. packing of stuff. but i've no motivation for anything at all. Lord i know you hear my calls. are you teaching me something? is there something you want me to learn? show me Lord. i need your guidance. Your word says that You are the Lamp unto my feet, Light unto my path. i need your light in my life Lord.

Pride

Everyone has to deal with pride. and i think God's dealing with mine now.


It's so hard to take cos every little thing, is almost like a big blow. i need to learn humility. i need to lay down my pride and just sit at the feet of God to worship Him.


i know when God deals with me. He's helping me to grow. and i love him for that.


Thank You Jesus. Teach me to love you from the inside out.

Come to the CABARET!!!!

Woohoo! i just booked tickets for my cousin and i to watch CABARET!

YAY.

Thank you Jesus that You've given us the financial capabilities to afford the tickets. Thank you Lord that you've also given me the financial abilities to afford a Laptop. but Lord, i need guidance. I need to know when you've arranged for me to buy. i need to, and want to know whether you've plans for me to buy a lap.


Thank you for your revelation and word which you are gonna speak to me. Lord i ask that you guide me in everything i do.

And Lord!! i'm excited about tomorrow! i'm gonna be working with Karthi!!

i believe this is your divine arrangement. i believe it Lord, and i trust that you have your plans in stored for both for us. and i know it'll be a pleasant surprise! woohoo!

Dear Lord Jesus, i thank you for everything you've done on the cross for me. i thank you that you came down, even when you didn't need to. i thank you that you are willing to do whatever God told you to do, in order that we can all be saved. I thank you that You've chosen me! i thank you that you've called me Your Friend. and i thank God that you're my father!

Thank you thank you. Lord reveal yourself to me everyday. that i may know more and more of you. Lord reveal your heart to me. Just as the song says - Burn it deep within my soul, new strength and zeal that makes me whole. Burn it deep within my soul, new strength and fire O Lord.

Thank you Jesus.


In the Holiest and most High name of Jesus - AMEN!

MY GOODNESS.

O dear lord Jesus!!!!

it seems like i've forgotten about You!! i've not been spending time with You. i only talk to You once in a very very long while. i'm so sorry. terribly sorry. to have to wait for me time and time again, sorry sorry sorry.


Dear Jesus Jesus.

i thank you for the projects that you've given me. and i know that all the stress You put all of us through is to make us stronger, for Your plans are to prosper us, not to harm us. Lord i know that not one bit of me is worthy of You. But you came down to for sinners like me, and not for the perfect ones. i thank you Lord from the bottom of my heart, to know that no matter what happens, you'll always be there for me.

Lord i need help with my projects. i need vocabulary and good grammar to edit my report. i need the patience and preseverance. i need i need i need.
So many needs. but Lord, teach me to cast aside my needs and wants and instead, turn my eyes upon You. Lord.

Help me to see beyond everything now. help me to see the joy of the Lord.

i thank you Jesus because i know you're gonna do a great work in me even as i decide to fast from meat and potatoes to worship You. Thank you Jesus.

Thank you Jesus that you're gonna remove my headaches and muscle aches. i thank you that i don't have to rely on the muscle relaxant and medication to ease my pain. i kinda like my sore throat and husky voice, so maybe you can let me keep my husky voice?


Sweet dreams Jesus! i'll see you there!

in Jesus most sweet and wonderful name - AMEN

Migraine! My Brain! O, Don't Complain! You won't stand to Gain!

Yes, truly, Migraine. My brain hurts.

Thank you Jesus for Korkor. i Thank you that You've placed him in my life with such a special role - My brother! Woo hoo! so i get to see him day in, day out. and when he gets a girlfriend next time, i'll reveal to her His deep dark secrets. HeH HeH heh.

No but really. Thank you God that Korkor is such a great brother, although sometimes he's just plain irritating. Nevertheless, he's the best brother there is. i thank you that You Love him so much, and You have so many many many more blessings for him all stored up in Heaven's distribution Centre! YAY!

Thank you God for Papa, i thank You for you've blessed him with soooo much. i thank You that you've blessed him with GREAT and wonderful cooking skills. Maybe when he goes up to heaven, You can make him your Executive Chef. I know You love his food, and i know you love it when he cooks with the Love of the Lord. But above all, Lord i thank you that you love him so much. So much more than anyone can ever Love him. i thank you that You are so graceful towards him. and i thank you that your unfailing love surrounds him all day long. Hallelujah.


Lord, i thank you for Aunty Leng. i thank you that She loves papa so much. although i know Her personality is Very different from Mummy, i know that you've placed her in our lives to teach us something. I pray Lord that you'll enrich Her life with your Everlasting Love. And also that She will be able to advise papa on certain matters. i pray that you will give her the patience when dealing with our family, because we all know that Papa, kor and myself - we can all be so stubborn at times. Yup. so i thank you that you've sent Aunty leng to care for us, and to love papa. Thank you Jesus!


And here, a song for You my Lord.

Worthy - 10th July 2006, 9.30 am

Jesus
You came from above,
Setting aside
The comforts of Heaven.

Jesus
You dwelled among us
Shamed and rejected,
You bore the burden for us.

Worthy (x2)
Worthy of my praises

You are Worthy
Worthy
Worthy of my praises

You are worthy of all my praises (x2)

Jesus
Your promises revive me,
Comforting me
In the midst of my troubles

Jesus
Let Your unfailing love
Surround me
Just as You promised

Worthy (x2)
Worthy of my praises

You are worthy
Worthy
Worthy of my praises

You are worthy of all my praises


*Guitar chords are D A, G

Fever Meder Bever Kever Dever

Today. i missed church. because. i was sick. still am anyway. abit headachy and my body aches.


But today. i talked to God in the morning.


okay. i can't type much cos i'm quite hungry.

Thank you Jesus for food. Thank you Jesus for you've given me strength to fast from meat and Potatoes for 40 days. thank you Jesus for my ear drums so i can hear.. stuff. Thank you Jesus that all my group projects will go well

ok papa's here to pick me up for dinner.

B.e.e.f.y

Just beefy.


O dear Jesus. Give Me strength to abstain from meat and my beloved POTATOES. give me strength and discipline! i know You're gonna do great works in Singapore, and i thank you for that.

Dear dear Jesus. How did You even manage to Not be tempted when You were in the desert for 40 days. Goodness. Help me, Help me. i Know its not like you'll condemn me if i fail. i Know this is extra effort to show how important the issues in my heart are. But i really wanna worship You and i wanna Show the devil that My spirit can triumph over my flesh. So i will do it!! and i will succeed with the glory of God! Hallelujah!


thank You Jesus, i thank You that You've made the world so small. such that.. um. everyone knows everyone. i thank You that Karthi has gotten the Job at Tkidz. i thank you that You are my provider. and i thank you that you..... There's so much i wanna say. yet i can't express it in words.


I Love you Jesus. and i pray each day you'll deposit Your seed of love in my heart, so that i can Love others just like i love myself. teach me to love those who are hard to love. Lord i thank you that Your mercies are new every morning, and i thank you that You will never abandon or forsake me. i love you Jesus, and i will worship you all the days of my life.


Lord, please talk to me, and tell me what you think of Beefy. i need advice about this issue. and Lord, i believe if it is Your will, All things will happen in Your time. thank you Jesus, i know i'll be hearing from you soon!


Hallelujah.

-

You laid aside Your majesty,
Gave up everything for me,
Suffered at the hands of those You had created.

You took all my guilt and shame,
when You died and rose again,
Now today You reign in heaven and earth exalted.

I really wanna worship You my Lord,
You have won my heart and i am Yours.
Forever and ever,
I will love You.

You are the only one who died for me,
Gave Your life to set me free.
So i lift my voice to You in adoration.



i think. Falling in Love with Jesus is the easiest and the only thing you can do when you're in his presence.

fall in love with Jesus.

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. i could go on forever.

i really could go on forever. Today in uncle PC's car, You (God) gave me a glimpse of Your wonderful love. Your precious love. You everlasting Love. i almost wept in the car.

Dear papa God.

i pray that You will let whatever Reinhard Bonnke preached today sink deep into my soul and spirit that i may never forget. Lord, whatever talents (Matthew 25 - Parable of the 3 servants) that i have unknowingly or knowingly buried underground, i pray that you'll Show me where are, what they are, and help me to uncover them, give me strength so that i can be used the way you have planned.

Lord Jesus, i know deep in me, you have so much more to do through me. But Lord, some days, i lose direction, i go off the path you've paved for me. Lord guide me. for your word says, You are the Lamp unto my path, and light unto my feet. Guide me. Show me Your way, Your Will. I Want YOUR will. Not mine.

i thank you Jesus. i thank You Jesus that You're gonna heal whatever hurt that XX is going thru now. i pray you'll bless her with an obedient heart, that She will obey whatever her mother says, not because She's her mother but Because YOU say so. Lord i pray that you will heal whatever hurt this has caused in their relationship, and i know that she's going thru a stage where hormones go nuts, but i know Lord that You are above all, and only You can heal this hurt, and control the crazy hormones.

Thank You Jesus. i wanna pray for Khartik (or Kharthik? karthik? kartik?) i thank you that He's able to be in the Students' Union and up for elections. Lord i pray with all my heart that you do a deep work in him, Even if he fails this time, i know you have something to teach him.

Lord i thank you for the leadership skills you have given him and i know that You have so much more in stored for Him, i thank you that You have Made all of the Head, and not the tail. Lord i pray for wisdom, Because you say in your word, that whoever needs wisdom should ask, and he shall receive it.

Lord i pray you'll teach him how and where to publicise, or um.. "Market" himself. i ask that you'll give him the words to speak to other people to convince Them to vote for him. i ask for favour for the students and teachers. i thank you for the success that you've blessed him with, and i thank you that you're gonna give him good friends who will be there to support him in times of need. i Pray that You will cause his spirit to be so sensitive to Your voice that He will know for sure, it is YOu and not the other voices in his head. i also pray for an open heart and mind. But above all, i pray that you'll reveal yourself to him, and in Your own creative ways, do your work in him.


i thank you that my tuition class in gonna be great tomorrow, i bind the spirit of negativity in me, which causes me to speak words of condemnation (eg. Dumb, sure fail, stupid. etc) Lord remove those words from my heart, and in replacement, i ask that You'll teach me to use words of encouragement. Lord give me the right skills to teach them, so that they can benefit from my classes, as well as have fun! Because Lord i know You're the Fun-est God there ever is!! so teach me how to let them have Fun in a productive way. i ask for wisdom, so that i am able to deliver all that they have to learn, and give me the words and phrases to say to them when i'm explaining.


Thank you jesus for your sweet sweet presence, i Love you Jesus. I love you i love you.


In the Glorious and beautiful name of JEsus - AMEN!

QuickOne Quick One!!

OkAY!

No time to blog long. have to go to schoo0oOool. and meet manda for lunch. YAY!

Dear father. i pray that you'll help me to get to school on time. i stand in the gap for Evey and pray that You'll send a friend to have lunch with her today, or in anyway, keep her mind of her loneliness. Lord, You were the one who created all of us, So only You know what Evelyn really desires and needs. So lord i pray that You'll reach out to her in Your own Creative ways cause her to see your great and wonderful love for her. Thank you Jesus!

Lord i'm sorry i have not been spending time with you, but yet i know you're always near me, waiting for me to talk to You. i promise Lord that i will try my very best to spend time with you. Lord even if its a short five minutes, i know You'll honour it. i thank you Lord for your Mercy and steadfast love.

Abba father i pray that today, you will guide me to do your work so that my relationship with You will be strengthened. and i pray you'll speak to me through your own creative means. and i know that when you speak to me, all the other voices in my head fade away. Lord i ask that every little thing i do today, will give glory to You. Thank you jesus for Your everlasting Love.

In Jesus' most wonderful and awesome name - AMEN!

Miracle catch Weekend!

WOAH.

today was an extremely tiring day. OH my my. With the Kids' carnival and all. But i believe i'm not the tired-est person. =) to all those who helped out and lost their voices - REST AND DRINK LOTS OF WATER!


Father father.
i thank you that the carnival was a success. Glory goes to YOU LORD! hallelujah. i believe it would have been impossible without You. i thank you for leading the pastors and all. And i thank you for keeping the children safe whilst having fun.

Dear Lord, i'm sorry for all the sins i've committed today. Hmm. such as telling the partial truth. which is lying. and um, being LaZY. Lord forgive my sins, teach me to repent. shesdlijfnkdlsieriyutkmngoidsfkdfnmcsduerfbbbdnks;;oisehrejrkdsmkcjdifsludfjehuyrbjfdkdnc.

Lord! school starts tomorrooooW!!! i pray you'll wake me up tomorrow at 6.30, so i can spend some quality time with you before going on with my stuff. i really really really wanna spend some time with you because i miss You. and i miss feeling your holy presence. i miss your sweet presence. so father i ask that you give me the spirit of discipline so i won't laze in bed until i oversleep but you'll wake me up and i'll get up Immediately. i Love you Lord.

thank you Jesus that my day tomorrow's gonna be great, i pray that you'll use me in your own ways to do your work. and Lord i pray you'll open my ears so that i can identify your voice and give me the obedience and boldness to do whatever the Spirit says.

i Love you Jesus, and i know you're here with me. You're all i need.


In Jesus' most precious and holy name, AMEN!

My. my.

Dear Lord Jesus, thank you for today. it has been GREAT!
although nothing much happened today, i still hope i've made You smile, in whatever small things i do. i'm sorry for being disobedient, and not spending time with you. i pray for Your mercy Lord, and i ask that you forgive me. Teach me to repent, step-by-step, day-by-day, i know you'll be there with me. These are some things which i need Your forgiveness for.

1. Not spending time with You.
2. talking bad about other people.
3. Judging other people. (please don't judge me)
4. Being Negative.
5. BEING LAZY

Sooooo many things i've sinned. ARGH.

Lord forgive me. i ask that you'll do a special work in me which will make me want to draw nearer to you. Lord ignite in me the Flame to want to do Your work, reach out to the lost, and serve the nations. Lord, i know i'm nothing close to Your standards, Mold me to be like you. teach me and guide me. help me to become the person you have created me to be.

i thank you Lord that you have forgiven all my sins, and above all i thank you for sending your only son, Jesus, to die on the cross for me. By the blood of the Lamb, i'm cleansed and renewed. i thank you God for you'll never abandon me. Thank you Jesus.

Holy spirit, i pray that you'll continue speaking to me in your own ways. i thank you that you're with me wherever i go, and i pray you'll lead me to do your work, in ways i've never known. God i pray you'll reveal to me your plans, and the people you want me to reach out to. i pray that you'll continue to tune my ears to hear your sweet voice, so that in any circumstance, i'll know whatever it is that you have in stored for me.


Thank you Jesus. i pray that tomorrow will be a great day at Church! and i know it'll DEFINITELY be a great day!! HALLELUJAH! And Lord, i ask that you'll send your Holy angels, the Cherubims, Seraphims, and Chariots of Holy Fire, to surround the church, just like in the visions you gave me, and i proclaim that NO evil spirit coming against FCBC will prosper IN THE NAME OF JESUS. i claim from the devil EVERY unsaved soul coming to church tomorrow, i ask that Lord, you'll cover their ears and protect their minds so that no doubt can enter to cause them to hesitate. For Your Name is above every other Name.
Thank you Jesus for everything that you've done for me. i pray you'll help me to wake up on time tomorrow, and please bless me with good time management skills so i won't spend too much time in the shower, or choosing clothes. Lord i pray you'll bless me with Journey mercy, i pray you'll send your holy angels to surround EVERYONE heading down to church.


WOOOO HOOOO!! HALLELUJAH!!!


in Jesus' Most Holy and Mighty name - AMEN!



Phew. that was long. =) Sweet dreams, Holy spirit!

WAH. its friday.

School's starting again next monday. tutorials and lectures. lectures and tutorials. tutorials and lectures and tutorials. hahhaa.

WAHA! my cousins are coming up with a NEW BLOGSKIN. WOO HOO. (o. he just came in to ask if i thought the blogskin was nice.) Of course it is. :D i think it should be dedicated to Romeo. who died near CNY this year. i miss her. wonder if bubbles do too.

today. i read a book on the 5 love languages of God (or something like that). i prayed before i started reading it, hoping that God will speak to me thru the book. And indeed, he did. God never fails. Hallelujah.

There are FIVE love languages. and everyone has a Primary Language. These are the 5:

1. Words of Affirmation
   
2. Gifts
   
3. Quality time
   
4. Acts of services
   
5. Physical touch

and my primary language is Physical touch. like when i'm upset, or when i need encouragement or.. um. when you wanna show you appreciate me. i get the message when i get a pat on the back or HUGS. (thats why God gave pple arms - TO HUG)

okay. so i was quite intrigued. how can God touch me physically (no dirty thinking, you pervs). and the book started talking to me, like when in church, and my hands start to shake, its God's way of telling me He's near. He's with me. He hears me. and sometimes in church (many times) when i cry or weep. its like God comforting me.

HALLELUJAH!!!!! i feel so loved at the thought of it.

God speaks ALL the love languages. Are YOU willing to experience this awesome love? =)


Hahahah. i'm so excited. God is FAITHFUL!!!


Dear father, i thank you that you have spoken to me, and once again, showing your faithfulness. Truly, Your love is greater than anyone can give. i thank You for protecting me from evil. i pray that you will bless me with sweet dreams tonight, and i ask that you speak to me through dreams and visions, so that i can be the salt that you want me to be, adding flavour into the lives of the people around me. i thank you that tomorrow will be a great day. You are all i need.

In Jesus' most precious and lovely name, Amen.