God has heard

Her Hundredth Post.

You gave me my first bouquet of flowers and my first bag of biscuits. Thank you :) it stays in my head forever.

You were late, we were supposed to go to church. and when you came. you said "damn. i'm so gonna regret not getting that cute girl's number when i wake up tmr feeling normal". i was nonchalant. but in my head, you were dead as a meatloaf.

You shouted in exasperation, "Can you not call my house phone. you woke everyone up." i'm sorry.

You told her you didn't love me. :) i still wonder.

You told her you wanted to be with her because you were my number five, but you were her number one. Did you not know, you were my number one? :)

It saddens me to think you used to compare yourself to him. i never did.

I remember. We were at the stairs, it was after church, and you told me what you told me. i will always remember the way you looked when you told me you were sorry. :) i love you.

It was after school, on 315. I got on the bus, and you were there with her. And she told me you got angry because i lied. did i?

When you came back from your holiday and found out everything, why didn't you answer my calls? Why didn't you come out to meet me when i was in the rain at your door? Was that not enough?

I remember. the first time i went to your place, it was raining. and you ran out to pick me up :) i love walking with you in the rain.

I remember. You called to ask if i was comfortable with her staying over at your place and i trusted you with everything.

I bought you an apple pie. and left it on your desk when you were sleeping. You were holding your phone. (i'm sorry). i picked it up and saw you were reading my messages. salty tears man.

We only took two pictures together. and you never wanted to keep any of them. i still wonder why.

I remember. The first time i saw you after everything was when Rocky and i met Lisa at gardens and she told us you were back in Motherland. Rocky insisted that we visit you since you were only back for a short while.We bought Bacardi and finished it on the way to your place. i was so nervous my head was bursting.

I mustered two years worth of courage and frustration. and said i wanted to talk. and you brushed me off and said you didn't feel like talking. it all felt so familiar. so familiar.

I wonder, why i still love you.